We headed up to upcountry to go for a ride on Monday. Greg was sick, not feeling well so he was home but wanted to get out of the house. He actually came and found me on my walk, picked up me and the kids and off for a drive we went. KInda random, but I think it was meant to happen.
We headed up to the house we were looking to rent. While there we stopped by a restaurant that I was hoping I could perhaps get a job at, since I'd have to quit my current job on the West side. The restaurant was dead. Maybe 10 people were present. My stomach sorta dropped right about then.
All of a sudden I thought to myself...are we doing the right thing? Cam is in a great school, loves it. I love my job and it should be getting busy with the holidays coming - it's the number one restaurant on the island...I'm lucky to have it, do I want to quit? NO! Greg would have to commute and I think that would get old - now he can come home for lunch, just to stop by to say hi, it's great.
So, I sorta freaked out the next day thinking about it all. I was having anxiety and decided to tell Greg that I do not want to move. This is nuts, if you know me and know how much I hate my house - my fixer upper of a house. But now we are fixing it up. It's getting nicer, it has our touch on it. Now we do have friends in the area, we are getting to know people. I have a good friend here now, Paula and I'd hate to lose touch with her. I am not ready to start over again. Not now.
I still think of upcountry as a goal but I believe that for now, it's just that and we will revisit in in the future. For now, my grass is still green on this side! Phew, I feel better!
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Busy few days!
15 years ago
4 comments:
I get like that sometimes. Just wanting change, and we end up doing something drastic (and stupid). I bet you are making a great decision.
i am glad you made a decision you are comfortable with before it was too late. i hope things continue to go well!
Now it makes sense! I can so relate to you and the wanderlust type of feeling. We do the same things. As you know we almost moved to South Africa. Glad we didn't right now. Someday I still want to, but not right now.
I will visit places and say "I want to live here", and we really do entertain the idea of making it work. I think it's great that you allow yourself to dream of these things. Dreams do become reality but sometimes it's all in the timing. Keep those dreams alive my friend :)
The important thing is making a decision you can live with. I'm sure you guys will make the right one. HUG!
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